Notting Hill sentiments

Watched ‘Notting Hill’ tonight with my mom. Love the quirky English sense of humor and the fragmented speech. The ending was marvelous. I told my mom so and she started this diatribe about how life can’t be like that. She says that American men are now becoming less ashamed of ‘having sugar-mamas’. Our friend paid for all her boyfriend’s rent, food…etc. Our neighbor expected his girlfriend to provide childcare (and the children weren’t her own!) and housing and she broke up with him after he repeatedly refused to marry her. My mom told me I should not expect true love, because there are many men digging for gold nowadays. I should not look for a rich man to lean on either, because everyone wants something. I never said marrying for money is my ideal, I want to be able to provide for myself. Being a housewife and devoting myself to the family appeals to me somewhat, but I realize such an arrangement is no longer a guarantee nowadays:
1. My spouse may not be willing to love me for life and I must be self-efficient so if he becomes infidel or abusive, I always have recourse.
2. I want to be able to contribute to society instead of cleaning house all day, a job that sounds rather, ah, endless.
3. 2 incomes could establish a better financial foundation for children and old age.
4. No work will make me stupid and rusty.
It truly pains me to think that marriage may not be a secure place in life anymore, not in the financial sense, but in the sense of having a home to come to always. Many divorces can be prevented. How can one be absolutely sure of the one you are to marry? The fear of a bad break-up chills my heart so I don’t dare love my spouse fully, and I know it is an evil thing to not love your spouse candidly.
I think psychiatry is like philosophy, because the point is getting to the bottom of the issue, trying to look into issues we take for granted and wonder why we take it for granted, why humans behave in that manner? I find it intensely interesting.